Acts of Service: "A sex masterpiece" (Guardian)

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Chapman, G. D., & Chapman, G. (2010). The five love languages: The secret to love that lasts. Northfield Pub. Fishman’s trying to deal with a range of overlapping issues here, around identity, class, patriarchy and various forms of power alongside what is/isn’t permissible sexual expression – what is, what should be, what might be forbidden. But it’s not clear to me what’s meant to be somehow universal about Eve’s experiences and what’s supposed to be unique to her as a fictional character. As a story I couldn’t help viewing this as a variation on Dangerous Liaisons with a dash of Fifty shades… and a hint of Exciting Times. It’s also achingly self-conscious in that now-classic Rooney-esque manner but, unlike Rooney, it’s also very narrowly-drawn, claustrophobic even. Fishman’s prose is polished but it can also be stagey and the concepts she’s exploring seem more than a little confused and confusing. It’s obvious Fishman set out, on some level, to examine and expose weighty issues around sex and sexuality – or at least weighty from her perspective. But, from my perspective, she never really succeeds in going beyond a superficial examination of the topics she introduces. E forse perché l’argomento è in più modi incandescente, la formazione filosofica della Fishman traspare in più punti dove sembra di leggere un romanzo illuminista, come se Lillian Fishman avesse avuto bisogno di “raffreddare” la materia del suo racconto, esaminarla con distanza. Speaking of the ways that heterosexual desire is fraught for women, and how it’s particularly fraught for queer and bisexual women — those tensions come through in the ways Olivia and Eve relate to each other. Can you tell me more about cultivating their arc? A kind of supercharged combo of Sally Rooney and Ottessa Moshfegh, and as smart as Joan Didion, Fishman isn’t just a brilliant writer—she’s a brilliant feeler, a great thinker. She has the gift we open books for.” —David Lipsky, author of The Art Fair

One of the most entertaining books about sex I’ve ever read . . . The perfect read for fans of Raven Leilani and Ottessa Moshfegh, this is a book that will have people talking.”— BuzzFeed Taking over chores or tasks that you know someone dislikes, such as washing dishes, doing laundry, or organizing. Additionally, there are a few things you can reflect on yourself to help you decide if acts of service are your love language. You could ask yourself the following questions: Acts of service are not gender or age-specific (Chapman & Campbell, 2008); anyone can have a preference or disinclination for them, which can also change over time as it is not a rigid concept. How do you know if your love language is acts of service? Quality time means giving our undivided attention to our partner, without distractions from work or other obligations.

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Firstly, identify things that future you will appreciate you have done. This could range from buying a planner to get more organized, crossing things off your to-do list, and cleaning or decorating your space to make it more inviting and aesthetically pleasing. Dr. Gary Chapman proposed in the 1990s that people have different ways that they prefer to give and receive love, and that recognizing and understanding these preferences can lead to healthier, more fulfilling relationships.

la rivoluzione sessuale che Reich tanto auspicava? Non saprei. Ma di sicuro appare come un passo, e anche qualcuno di più, in quella direzione. Evviva. Alleluja. As each act of their complicated, three-way affair unfolds across a cold and glittering New York, Eve is forced to confront the questions that most consume her: What do we bring to sex? What does it reveal of ourselves, and one another? And how do we reconcile what we want with what we think we should want? Give Willingly: If you’re performing an act with visible reluctance or complaints, it can feel insincere. Try to find joy in helping others so your attitude remains positive.

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it’s really an easy five star, filled with taboo topics and fascinating characters and revealing dynamics. it’s about love and sex, gender and power, and how to find yourself or even know what that would look like. it’s about searching for happiness and meaning while being unable to admit that’s what you’re doing. this book has a devastating 3.19, and this is in spite of being complete perfection from beginning to end. I know I am biased because I am exhausted with so many literary fiction books presenting women who required male validation even if they can't stand them, but I expected this to be a subversion of that where the intersection of desire is also influenced by how people DO feel about women instead of treating the relationships between women as something so simple and so natural that they must not mean as much because somehow, dating men is so, so much harder but also, of course, more rewarding. Fishman’s seductive debut novel centers questions of sexuality and sex, sexual freedom and power.” — Autostraddle